Mirror
by Keruseyu
Summary: Pain, hatred, abuse- this is the life of Kel Mindelan. Neal may change that- if she lets him. I changed the rating for violence and bad words. : ) This story is COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

Mirror  
  
by Keruseyu  
  
chapter one  
  
===  
  
Hey folks! ANOTHER sad, painful fic! Gomen!  
  
===  
  
Reflected in the flowing water,  
  
a fragment of memory  
  
I swore in my heart  
  
I'd never repeat those thoughts again.  
  
Reflected in the flowing water,  
  
there is sorrow, so  
  
with this power, with this life,   
  
I want to protect you.  
  
What I lost was my belief.  
  
But now, I know love is unconquerable.  
  
Even if it's miserable, and the present doesn't lead anywhere,  
  
that is why we help each other.  
  
Reflected in the flowing water,  
  
a fragment of memory  
  
I swore in my heart  
  
I'd never repeat those thoughts again.  
  
Reflected in the flowing water,  
  
there is sorrow, so  
  
with this power, with this life,  
  
I want to protect you.  
  
When I see my heart's shadow in the water-mirror,  
  
that is the birth of love; yet another face.  
  
For all that is precious,  
  
I won't turn away from pain any more.  
  
For all that is precious,  
  
I won't turn away from pain any more.  
  
===  
  
Keladry stared out of her window. A bird flew by, chirping happily. She stared blankly as it flew to its nest in a tree below, tending its chicks eagerly.   
  
"Yo. Kel."   
  
She turned at her father's voice. A slight glint of fear crossed her face as he glared at her. "I'm goin' out. Clean up while I'm gone, all right?"   
  
Hs strode out the door of their large new house, not bothering to wait for her answer. Kel sighed deeply, rolling up her sleeves. They had moved in just yesterday, and her father was already going out to drink. Kel would never say as much to his face, but he could at least order cleaning personel.   
  
She winced as she rolled up her sleeves, accidently jarring her most recent bruise. He had given it to her just yesterday, when she had dropped a glass vase while organizing their house. The glass was slippery, and the vase wasn't at all valuable, but he found no mercy while dealing with his 'unruly' daughter.   
  
He gave her these 'lessons' all the time, which is why he never hired anyone- they'd probably figure it out. Kel herself was very good at hiding it. He rarely hit her in the face, but when he did she always covered it up with her adept makeup skills.   
  
She clutched the locket around her neck. Her mother had given it to her before she left, abandoning her and taking her little sister Keru. She flipped it open, flinching at the picture inside. She quickly closed it, a single tear dripping down her face as she banished her memories and schooled her face to its usual emotionless stare.   
  
Taking windex out from under her bathroom sink, she started cleaning mirrors. She hoped he would be in a good mood when he got home- but then again, he usually wasn't. Kel could only hope he would leave her alone- she started school tommorrow.   
  
Scrubbing at the already spotless mirrors, she prayed silently for her own protection.  
  
But she couldn't blame him.   
  
It was her fault anyways.  
  
===  
  
The door opened. Kel looked up from where she was reading on the couch. It was only 10- he was back early.   
  
Putting down her book, Kel stepped into the hallway. "Dad?" She called, keeping her voice calm.   
  
He was standing in the darkness. The door slammed shut.   
  
'Oh no.'  
  
"D-dad? You want anything?" She helped him with his coat, taking it off and hanging it neatly its hook beside the door.   
  
She had just finished when a fist slammed into her back, sending her flying forward onto the coatrack.   
  
Kel instantly curled into a ball, covering her head meekly as he kicked her prone form.   
  
"You know why your mother left?"  
  
She remained silent.   
  
"ANWSER ME!!!"  
  
She refused to answer, scared to hear his response.  
  
"Because you're a good-for-nothing, bitchy little whore!" He yelled.   
  
It hurt to hear that. She was only seven when it happened. It wasn't true, she knew that, but it still hurt like hell.  
  
He continued to beat her senseless, not even avoiding her face. 'My God... hurts...' Kel coughed blood onto the floor, eyes glazing over to the verbal and physical abuse her father was unleashing upon her.   
  
===  
  
Kel woke to sunlight coming through the hall window. From the light coming from the window, it was at least 8 a.m.   
  
She moved her limbs, making sure nothing was broken. Green, blue, purple, yellow- these colors were airbrushed upon her body from her father's blows.   
  
Gripping the coatrack, Kel hoisted herself to her feet, tears streaming down her cheeks in pain. She made her way up the stairs to her room, almost stumbling into her shower. Not bothering to take off her clothes, she pushed the knob all the way on 'hot' and slid down the shower wall, letting the steamy liquid soak her all the way through. She stared dimly at the white shower wall, tears of pain running down her cheeks.   
  
The water running into the drain was tinted scarlet; she was either bleeding or had washed off dried blood. She doubted the latter- usually open wounds didn't close that easily- and undressed to find the source of the red liquid.   
  
Kel tossed her drenched garments into the tub and examined her body. Bruises tainted her fair skin all over, making her whole body a mixture of different colors.   
  
She found the skin of her back was slit in a long, jagged part from her father's first punch. Blood leaked down her back, spilling onto the white tile floor. Sighing, she dried the blood and managed to bind the wound with a long length of bandage she kept for emergencies like this. She washed the rest of her body and stepped into her room to get dressed for school.  
  
===  
  
Neal looked up from his trigonometry problem when the classroom door swung open. A girl stood in the doorway, books in her arms, looking meek and apologetic. "I'm sorry, Ms, um, Hutchins. I slept in... I'm very sorry for the interuption."   
  
The teacher smiled warmly. "It's okay, dear. Class was almost over anyway." She turned to her students. "Class, this is Keladry Mindelan from...?"  
  
"Just transferred from Germany."  
  
"Oh. Well, welcome to Corus High school. I hope you'll make friends and enjoy yourself."  
  
"Thank you very much, ma'am."  
  
"Your welcome. Why don't you take a seat beside Neal?"  
  
Kel made her way wordlessly to the back of the school room, shoulder-length brown hair wisking across her shoulders. Her flare jeans and long-sleeved silk shirt hung loosely on her; both were black.   
  
Her black boots clicked as she stopped beside her new seat, stooping stiffly to place her books in the basket under the desk. She sat in the stiff-backed yellow chair, getting to work on her math assignment.  
  
===  
  
Sorry folks, too tired to write more! -_-!!! 


	2. Chapter 2

Mirror   
  
by Keruseyu  
  
chapter two  
  
'Talk to him'  
  
===  
  
REVIEW MORE. ^^!  
  
===  
  
Neal watched as the silent, dark form settled gracefully into her seat. She winced when her elbow hit the desktop, but did not falter as she carefully flipped open her book and began to work.  
  
He stared. He felt drawn to the girl, who looked frail and beautiful underneath her inky clothing. She turned, sensing his gaze. Fear, tainted with guilt and regret, crossed her hazel orbs.  
  
Neal turned back to his classwork, confused. Why was she scared?   
  
She appeared so... alone. The way she moved spoke of hidden agony- maybe family trouble?   
  
He didn't know- but he'd find out soon enough.  
  
===  
  
Why the hell is he staring at me?  
  
He's cute. And he looks nice... But why would anyone be interested in me?   
  
I mean, sure, I wear black.   
  
Big deal. I want to talk to him. Be friends.  
  
But that could never happen. I mustn't take risks. It might slip out.  
  
'Would that be so bad?'  
  
Damn my little, evil conscience.   
  
'I don't think it could be that bad.'  
  
You don't know.  
  
'... I do.'  
  
Leave me alone.  
  
'Alone. *Giggle* That's funny. You're always alone, Kel.'  
  
Not when you're here.  
  
'But am I not you? I am simply the part of you that confronts reality.'  
  
That's bullshit.  
  
'Is it? I'd never know the difference. That means its the same as your- our- current condition, yes?'  
  
Shut the hell up.  
  
'I'm trying to help you.'  
  
I don't need your help.  
  
'Really. That's why you suffer pain from that ignorant, stupid fool you call "father"?'  
  
  
  
No. It's not like that.  
  
'Yes, it is. Face it, one day you'll have to tell somebody. Or are you too scared?'  
  
After you've lived through hell, nothing scares you.  
  
'Right. I want a favor.'  
  
Depends.   
  
'Talk to him.  
  
I dare you.'  
  
...  
  
Alright.   
  
'Yes! That's the spirit.'  
  
But only if he talks first.  
  
'...'  
  
===  
  
The bell rang, bringing me back from the shadowed slums of my mind.   
  
Looking down at my paper, I see that I've had completed the whole assignment.  
  
Maybe thinking isn't such a bad idea...   
  
"Hello! I'm Neal!"  
  
I glanced up, startled.   
  
"Oh, um... Hi."  
  
'See? He talked first!'  
  
My inner self is giggling madly- probably thrilled it won for once.  
  
'HEY! I've won more than once.'  
  
How many times?  
  
'Two.'  
  
....  
  
A hand tapped my shoulder. "Oh, sorry. I was thinking."  
  
"I said, do you need a guide?"  
  
Wait. This can't happen.   
  
He'll find out.  
  
He'll hurt me.  
  
An image appears in my mind. I drift back to fourth grade- the worst year of my life.   
  
*Flashback*  
  
"Hey, Mom, Dad! I'm ho-ome!" I shouted, skipping cheerily into the living room.   
  
No one was there.   
  
"Mom? Dad?"  
  
No one. Not even my baby brother, or his Nanny.   
  
'Oh well. I suppose they went out.'  
  
Smiling, I went up to my room, lugging my backpack.   
  
Taking out my homework, I completed it in record time. I picked up my diary, prepared to write about my eventful day at school.   
  
'Dear diary, today was the most perfect day ever! I won the spelling bee, and it's my birthday, too. Tommorow we're all going out to dinner and a movie with Naomi and Rika. (My best friends!) Dad invited grandma and grandpa, and they're flying all the way from Tokyo. It's going to be the best!'  
  
Downstairs, the door creaked.   
  
'Oh, hold on. Dad just got home!' I wrote a huge smiley on the paper and scrambled downstairs.   
  
"Dad!" I called, voice overflowing with happiness.   
  
"You're home!!!"  
  
I ran up to him, holding my arms out for my usual hug and the "How was school, honey?".   
  
But it never came.   
  
He just stood there looking dejected and furious.  
  
"Daddy, what's wrong? Is Mommy all right?" I used my pet names, as I did when afraid.  
  
He stiffened at my words, and looked at me, and face full of hatred.  
  
I took a step back. "D-daddy? Are you all right?"  
  
"You..."  
  
"I what, Daddy?"  
  
"You KNEW!!!"  
  
His hand came out of nowhere, landing a bruising slap on my cheek. The force of his blow sent me sprawling back.   
  
My Dad had never, ever slapped me. Never harmed me in any way. He always said I was a good girl. That I was his little angel. A single tear trickled down my cheek from the pain.  
  
"I- I knew what?"  
  
"That she was going to leave!!!"  
  
"Who, Daddy? Who left?"  
  
He thrust something at me- a piece of grimy notebook paper.  
  
'Dear Kel,  
  
I can't deal with this any longer. All the frustration from that stupid father of yours. You like him, and he's always been nice to you.   
  
But you don't know him. I'm sorry, dear, but I'm taking your brother and leaving. I can't handle this relationship anymore. With you or your father.  
  
I can't stand it any more.  
  
Goodbye.'  
  
I stared at the note.   
  
"What?"  
  
"She left becausew of YOU!!!"  
  
He seemed to forget the note mentioned him.  
  
But... why leave me?  
  
I had always been perfect.  
  
Straight A's, every grading period. I was always the smartest.  
  
I was the captain of the Soccer team, class president, and I had recieved the 'Terrific Kid' award at least once a year since I turned five.  
  
Why? I had good friends, helped around the house. My room was always clean, I never whined. When I wanted something, I'd either ask nicely or earn the money to get it.  
  
So... Why?  
  
The thought haunted her mind as her crazed father slapped her around. He grew enraged at her lack of reactions.  
  
He slapped her harder.   
  
His blows soon turned to kicking and punching.  
  
And I woke up the next day, in my bedroom floor.   
  
The ripped pages of my diary fluttering around the room.   
  
I never did get my birthday party.  
  
In fact, I haven't had a birthday party since then.  
  
The only thing I got that year was pain.  
  
Pain, pain, pain.  
  
And when we moved, my friends suffered too.  
  
===  
  
"No thank you, I am quite capable by myself."  
  
He glanced at me, startled. "Sorry." He mumbled.  
  
I made my way slowly and carefully through the desks into the crowded locker.  
  
===  
  
Neal stared after her, stricken.   
  
"Jeez. What a snob." His best friend, Owen, murmured.  
  
Alanna, another of his friends, made a face at Kel's retreating back. "Bitch is more like it."  
  
His girlfriend, Yukimi, spoke up. "She seems very troubled."  
  
They all turned to look at her.  
  
"What?!" She protested. "I'm not pulling that out of my ass. It's true."  
  
They all just shook their heads and left.  
  
But she had talked.  
  
And that's what gave Neal courage.  
  
===  
  
YAY! Another chappie! 


	3. Chapter 3

Mirror  
  
by Keruseyu  
  
Chapter 3  
  
===  
  
Somebody FLAMED me. .! And didn't even give their name.   
  
Well, you stupid asshole, SCREW OFF! My story, my plot- I AM THE AUTHOR. In a fic, the author knows ALL. So either get your head outta your ass or shut the hell up.  
  
Bastard...  
  
===  
  
'Why the HELL did you DO that!!!???'  
  
He'll... the rest of my thought trailed off.  
  
'He'll WHAT?'  
  
He'll hurt me.  
  
My inward voice softened its tone, trying to be quieter.  
  
'It's okay, he's a nice guy. He wouldn't... you know.'  
  
How do you know?  
  
'...'  
  
That's my point. You don't. He'll hurt me, just like HE hurts me.  
  
'Let's talk-'  
  
NO!!!!  
  
I grimace. I never get very rough with my conscience. But fear made me bold.  
  
No. I will NOT put myself in the path of sorrow again. And that is FINAL.  
  
My thoughts are high-strung with emotion. I won't let this conquer me.  
  
I was going to SURVIVE, God damn it!!!  
  
And in order to do that, I had to let everything go. Escpecially friendship.  
  
===  
  
"Hey, Kela-"  
  
Neal frowned as the girl brushed past him yet again. She had been pulling this crap for the last month.  
  
He'd try to talk. And she would run away. Not literally, of course, but she would duck into the bathroom and stay there for a while until he left, even if it meant being late for class. And he'd try again, but she'd repeat the procedure, and then he's be stuck talking to thin air. Of all his friends, only Yukimi supported the idea. Others, like Alanna and Owen, told him to let it go. But he couldn't.   
  
There was always that little bit of hope, deep in his heart, that she would respond eventually.  
  
So giving up was out of the question.  
  
===  
  
Kel sighed as she sat down under a tree to eat her lunch. She felt stupid, being the only kid who had the nerve to sit in the courtyard with the 'other crowd'- the punks and suicide cases. People who were street-tough. Of course, they never bothered her. She hadn't proved herself through fighting- but wasn't the fact that she never spoke outside of the classrooms enough?   
  
Almost everyone at school thought of her a Gothic freak who was secretly a sadist, or something like that. She had no friends- the only ones who bothered her were that annoying couple. Neal and Yukimi.   
  
She ate her food silently, not even glancing up when a very familiar group of people stepped into the courtyard.  
  
===  
  
Alanna glared at the kids who had taken their table.   
  
Neal's group glanced around the room hopefully, but to no avail. All the seats were taken.   
  
They glanced out the window. "We could always sit outside?" Neal said pleadingly. Alanna, Owen- even Yukimi. They all gave him looks that could kill. "With THEM?" Alanna gestured outside at the druggist wierdos leaning against the courtyard wall.   
  
Neal gulped. "Um... It wouldn't be that bad..." They glared at him again.   
  
"Neal, you're being stupid!" Owen pointed out. "They'd kill us! And you only want to talk to miss bitch!" Neal flushed.   
  
"Look at her, guys! She's all alone!" Neal pouted, something he rarely did. It was sure to work.  
  
And it did.  
  
Alanna groaned. "All right..." she grumbled. "But if they beat the shit out of us, I'm sending the medical bill to you!"  
  
They all strode resignedly into the courtyard.  
  
===  
  
Alanna gasped as someone grabbed her shoulders from behind.   
  
"What th' hell is a hottie like you doin' out here?" Questioned an obviously stoned teen.   
  
"Okay, maybe this wasn't such a good idea..." Neal gulped. Dangerous-looking people were closing in on their small party.  
  
===  
  
Alanna shifted into a fighting position as they seperated her and Yukimi from the rest.   
  
"What have we here? Two little girls... aren't they precious!" Taunted a guy who was around 7 feet tall. Alanna's purple eyes blazed with fury as her solid fist connected with his jaw. Yukimi whimpered as a guy tugged her skirt, hurriedly kicking him in the stomach as she scampered away.   
  
Alanna continued to thrash about, knocking many out. But they were outnumbered, and soon even their male friends began to tire.  
  
Neal, who had been backing slowly towards the door, motioned for his friends to run. Yukimi fell at the last moment, screaming as a guy grabbed fistfuls of her long ebony locks.   
  
Someone grabbed the back of his shirt and practically threw him inside.   
  
"Wait! Yukimi!" he gasped out. Alanna, the one who had grabbed him, rushed to the window to watch.   
  
She yelled as a guy flew through the window, sending shards of glass flying across the now-empty lunch room.   
  
===  
  
'Why the hell did I have to go save her!?' Kel thought to herself as she threw yet another idiotic fool aside. Yukimi was slung over her shoulder, knocked out by a blow to her head.  
  
'I am SUCH a fool!'  
  
She rushed to the window, hurriedly handing the unconscious girl to her boyfriend.   
  
"Get the hell out of here!" She hissed as Neal joined her through the shattered window. "No!" he said quietly, yet firmly. "I'm staying!"  
  
"But the girl-"   
  
"She'll be fine."  
  
Kel glared at him, but held her position. She couldn't let him know she was bordering on exhaustion from her beating the night before- that every time she took a blow, she was worsening her terrible condition considerably.   
  
She couldn't. Panting from lack of air, she socked another guy across the courtyard. She fell against the wall, breathing heavily.   
  
'Can't... let...'   
  
Her eyes fluttered shut as she slumped against the wall.   
  
===  
  
"Hey... you okay?" Neal shook the girl gently. After beating the ever-loving shit out of the kids attacking her, he had valiantly picked her prone form off the ground and taken her away to someplace safe. That was the glorified version. Neal actually slipped in a pile of blood and nearly squished the girl, and had gotten out by pure luck and luck alone.   
  
He then proceded to dash like a maniac through the deserted halls.  
  
He started when a small hand tapped his shoulder. He tensed, then relazed when he realized who it was. "Yukimi, thank God..." Yukimi gasped, looking Kel over. "Hurry! This way!" She led him into the parking lot, assisting him and Neal into Alanna's van.   
  
They sped off. Owen was driving, and Neal was shoved into the front seat. Owen- who didn't even have his liscense yet- nearly ran every red light there was to get to Alanna's house as quickly as possible. He gritted his teeth as Neal urged him to go faster for Kel's sake. He didn't give a shit about HER. Yukimi, Alanna, and Neal were the only ones he cared about.   
  
He slammed into the driveway, barely missing the fence. They rushed Kel inside- or rather, Neal did. Alanna and Owen just stood by, and Yukimi scurried to get a medical kit. Neal laid the girl down on the couch, looking on worriedly as Yukimi removed her jacket.  
  
Neal gaped. Bruises, both old and new, covered every inch of the girl's skin. On top of these was a tapestry of scars, cuts, and bandages. Half of the white linen strips had turned red with fresh blood. Yukimi pried a bandage off Kel's arm, blanching as blood flowed freely over her hands.   
  
Alanna came around the corner, dropping the icepack she had been holding to her newly developed black eye.  
  
She stared at the girl on the couch, violet orbs wide in shock. "N-neal?" She whispered, sinking down next to the pair.   
  
Yukimi snapped out of her horrified stupor. "Neal, out." she ordered, voice shaking. Neal wordlessly got up and left the room.   
  
===  
  
Alanna assisted Yukimi in taking the unconscious girl into the guest bedroom. Only then did they truly assess her wounds.   
  
Yukimi felt Kel's body, solemnly poking and prodding. She sat back, letting out a deep sigh.   
  
Alanna got up from her post at the door and laid a hand on her friend's shoulder. "How bad is it?"  
  
The other girl took a deep breath.   
  
"5 broken ribs with two half-healed, a fractured wrist, dislocated shoulder, cracked collar bone, badly sprained ankle and numerous cuts and bruises."  
  
Alanna whistled. Just today in physical education, the girl she had referred to so often as 'that bitch', had landed on her side while saving their volleyball game against the other team. Alanna winced at the pain such a fall would cause if she had 5 broken ribs. 'And yet she didn't say a word...'   
  
"Girl's got guts." Alanna said stoutly.   
  
Yukimi laughed, a harsh sound that sounded pained. "No, Alanna. This isn't a joke. She couldn't possibly have gotten all of this today."  
  
Alanna started as a tear splashed on the unconscious girl's cheek. "She... she said something to me today. Y'know, in the fight.  
  
"I asked her why she came to help me. And she said..."  
  
Another tear fell.   
  
"I don't know if it was the fight getting to her head, but she told me. She said 'I get hurt enough. Why not a little more? I can take this pain. It'll be tripled once I get home, anyway.' It was the way she said it, Alanna. It made me feel so sad... Like something was tearing my heart in two. She didn't deserve anything we did to her. When you and Owen called her 'bitch.' I think..."  
  
"You think what?"  
  
"I think we should help her."  
  
===  
  
Say it. That had to be the sappiest, corniest, stupidest chappie I have EVER posted. I'm really stressed. Well, Merry Christmas, happy Hannukah, etc! 


	4. Chapter 4

Mirror  
  
by keruseyu  
  
chapter 4  
  
===  
  
Kel sat up quietly. She couldn't see; a silvery-white, filmy haze hung before her eyes. She moved to sit up, tensing as pain ran through her battered body.   
  
Finishing the motion, she reached to feel what masked her eyes. A thin ace bandage was wrapped around her head.   
  
Wait.  
  
A bandage? 'What the hell!' The injured girl thought, fear coursing through her body. 'No... no, no, NO!!!!'   
  
She swung her legs over the side of what she was laying on. A bed, but it wasn't hers. '  
  
'My father wouldn't do this for me!'  
  
Kel ripped the bandage off her head, wincing slightly as a trickle of red ran down her cheek. "At least I know what the bandage was for..." She murmured sarcastically. She wadded the bandage and placed it over the cut, applying firm pressure. She held it there for a while, then pulled it from her skin. It was slightly drenched with the red liquid that was so familiar to her. Laying it carefully on the bed, she surveyed the room.   
  
Light blue walls, with slightly darker carpet and bed linen. She smiled faintly- blue always had been her favorite color.   
  
Regular furniture; a door led off to a bathroom. She turned to finish her inspection. A red-haired form in the corner... WAIT!  
  
"What the HELL?!" She yelped, staring at Alanna- the girl who hated her so much and called her 'bitch.' Sinking slowly to the floor, she let herself breath steadily to regain her calm.   
  
A hand tapped her shoulder and she flinched, instantly curling up into a protective ball.   
  
The hand tapped once more, and a soft voice accompanied it. "Get up, chibi neko..." It whispered.   
  
Kel shook her head violently. "Iie!!! Iie... iie!!!"   
  
The voice floated towards her again. "Hai, chibi neko. Hai!"   
  
The hand pulled her from her position and up on her feet. "Are you okay?" The raven-haired Japanese girl who spoke smiled apologetically.   
  
"Gomen nasai. Please excuse us for startling you." Taking Kel's hand, she dragged the girl carefully out of the room. She led the dazed Kel into a small, quaint room that looked rather Japanese. "These are my personal chambers. Now, tell your story."  
  
The brown-haired girl shook her head violently. "Iie." She murmured.   
  
"Why not?" The smile never left the girl's soft, round face. "There is no one here to hear you aside from myself-"  
  
"Iie."  
  
The girl questioned silently.   
  
"Because if I do, you'll hurt me."  
  
Her smile turned to a frown. "Hurt you!?"  
  
Kel flinched back, expecting a blow. Instead, a soft hand patted her on the head. "It'll be okay... no one in this household with ever hurt you..."  
  
'That doesn't mean he won't.'  
  
Yukimi sighed and withdrew her hand. "Tell me when you're ready..." she murmured. "Now, stay here. I'm going to get you something to eat."  
  
===  
  
Kel wandered absently through the house.   
  
(A/N: Stay? Hah! As IF!!! .^!!!)  
  
It was larger than it seemed, with vaulted ceilings and lots of windows, though most of these were covered in heavy drapes. Looking blankly into every room, Kel stopped immediatly when she saw the treasure sitting on the other side of the room.  
  
She walked over to it, tracing its black and white features before slipping her finger onto one if its keys. The beautiful 'pang' flew through her, and she sat down on the stool.   
  
A piano.   
  
//flashback (Kel's POV)//  
  
"Mommy?"  
  
My mother knelt down beside me, smiling brightly. "What, dear?"  
  
I flushed. I covered my face with my tiny, plump toddler hands, peeking shyly through my fingers. "Could you teach me how to play the paino?"  
  
She laughed; a sound that filled the air cheerily. "It's 'piano.'" I looked up. She was smiling, a bright, sunny smile that filled me with happiness.   
  
"Sure, baby! Of course I will!" Picking me up in her arms, she carried me over to the piano, and proceded to teach me which keys were which.  
  
//end flashback//  
  
A tear splashed onto the piano's elegant keys. Kel touched another note, sending it wafting through the air, pulling bacl her memories.   
  
//flashback//  
  
"K-kel... play me something..."  
  
The weak voice came from the bed, where Kel's mother lay in a heap. Kel smiled brighly at her mother, hiding her tears. She held Kel's sister, rocking the child slowly. Kel masked pain and sorrow behind her mask. Her mother hadn't talked to her at all in the weeks since her baby sister was born.  
  
Turning back to the piano, Kel thought back to when she was little. Her and her mother, sitting together, playing songs and laughing, dancing.   
  
Kel started out soft, pulling her emotions into the song. She sang quietly inside her head. 'I long to feel real, to belong to the world.'  
  
'But life doesn't like me enough. If for moment, my heart could be seen-' Kel's inner singing was interupted when a baby's cry split the air. "Damn it, Kel! You woke the baby!" Turning back to the wailing child, she quieted her. "Don't ever do that again!" Getting up, her mother stormed out of the room, holding the baby with a tenderness that Kel had known.  
  
Tears plunked down her cheeks, landing on the black-and-white notes and splotching them.   
  
She put her head down on the keys and sobbed.   
  
//end flashback//  
  
Kel plunked each note in turn, both reveling and writhing in them as they took her.   
  
Seeing her father burn her mother's piano in the backyard.  
  
Playing at a concert while her mother cheered her on and her father grinned that huge smile of his that was so luminant whenever he was close to his wife.  
  
Sneaking into the music room during lunch to play the piano.  
  
Getting caught for it and being punished by her father.   
  
Her mother frowning as she refused to let her younger, evil sister play her electric keyboard that was a birthday present from her late grandmother.   
  
Sobbing as her sister banged her keyboard to pieces on the concrete.   
  
Watching her grandfather play smoothly and gracefully on the hospital's piano the day before her died.  
  
Many more painful memories flew through her head.   
  
She plunked the keys in patterns now, forming the melody of her favorite song.  
  
"When one forgets to put the emotions that overflow in her heart to rest, they burn the color of passion. I used to believe without a doubt that I could reach my dreams, no matter how far off they were. But that me from long ago now sleeps inside my heart. Dreams are more fragile and fleeting than a glass rose, so then why are we destined to dream?" She sang softly.   
  
"Nice." a vocie commented from behind her. Kel spun, ending her song abruptly.  
  
"It's true."  
  
Alanna shook her head. "If that's what you want to think."  
  
Kel turned back to the keys.  
  
"One more thing."  
  
"What?" Her voice was icy.  
  
"Though dreams are 'more fragile and fleeting than a glass rose,' hope lives within those dreams. And though hope is frail, it's hard to kill." 


	5. Chapter 5

Mirror  
  
by Keruseyu  
  
Chapter 5  
  
===  
  
Hey! I know this is kinda stupid, but it makes the chapter longer! I'd like to announce the coming of my new betas: BLACK^KniGhtZ, and Rachel. Rachel hasn't got an account yet, but I see her every day.   
  
Special thanks to everyone who's cheered me on in all of my fabulous, heartfelt reviews! You don't know how much I appreciate it! Thank you so much!   
  
Now...  
  
Look at my artwork at keruseyu.deviantart.com! My screenname is Keruseyu! Comment on my art! Or I'll NEVER, EVER write a chapter of this story again!!! *Holds up computer, ready to break it in half* I'm going to post some 'Mirror' fanart there. Don't expect any pics of Neal. There may be one, but it'll look horrible. I can't draw guys...  
  
Now, on with the story! This poem does not rhyme. It isn't supposed to.   
  
===  
  
Don't look the mirror.  
  
The mirror shows the truth.  
  
The bending your image is easy to hide.  
  
Except when seen in mirrors.  
  
Illuminating angles,   
  
Forever true to all.  
  
Should you be the evil queen?  
  
To question as in fright,  
  
To kill the thing opposed to you,  
  
Like mirrors did Snow White?  
  
Revealing isn't always best.  
  
In fact, it's mostly bad.  
  
But your heart desires mirrors,  
  
To show it's true nature.  
  
In Mirrors.  
  
===  
  
Kel sat unmoving at the table. A plate of chicken and white rice, accompanied by steamy tea, was set before her. She was ravenous, but did not touch the delicious looking meal.  
  
Alanna and Yukimi looked at her untouched nourishment. Yukimi frowned- Alanna scowled.   
  
"EAT!" They demanded simultaneaously.   
  
Kel shook her head. Yukimi sighed, trying to be more patient. "Why won't you?" She asked softly.   
  
'If I eat it, I'll only throw it up after he beats the hell out of me.'  
  
"Aren't you hungry?" Alanna growled. Kel shook her head again, not trusting herself to speak. She might blurt out her whole life story. It had been dying to get out for ages, but she wouldn't give in.  
  
'No way. I'm not eating until I get home.'  
  
Kel stood and deserted the kitchen, padding across the hall to her room. She closed the door, locking it with a barely audible 'click!'  
  
She pulled on her regular clothes, gratefully noticing they had been laundered in her presence. Scrawling a quick note, she left it on the undisturbed bed covers.   
  
Prying the window open, she swung her feet over the wide window ledge and lowered herself into the garden. Pulling her coat tightly against her, she set off for her own home.   
  
===   
  
Hey everybody! What do you think? Extremely short, yes? 


	6. Chapter 6

Mirror  
  
by Keruseyu  
  
Chapter 6  
  
===  
  
Dedication: This chapter goes to a very supporting reviwer of mine, and a new friend on Deviantart! Congrats to Cymarel, thanks so much! Now I actually have comments on my pictures! YAY!!! Thankyouthankyou- mmf!  
  
Meg-chan: *places hand over mouth* Okay, I'm never giving you candy EVER AGAIN!!! Waaaayyy too hyper!   
  
Keru: Um, Meg? You've been my best friend for 7 FREAKIN' YEARS AND YOU _JUST_ FIGURED THAT OUT???!!!!  
  
Meg-chan: *Gazes off into the distance* Have I really known you for that long?   
  
Keru: *sighs* Meg, you are like soooooo screwed!   
  
Meg-chan: I'm not screwed, I'm nailed!!! :P Stupid fool!  
  
Keru: Okay, time to go... *Shoves Meg into a dark pit of doom* There! Depressed, depressed... That really helps! The award of commenting on my art goes to.... Cymarel! Yes, Cymarel has won her own personal story from me, dedication belonging to her, with her plot, anything she wants. And as a bonus, this chappie is dedicated to, you guessed it, Cymarel! Don't complain. I said to go to deviantart.com to comment, folks. I'll give special mentions to those who commented in reviews. Such as Celestial Secrets and AJ 4EVA! Thank you!  
  
As for Feathers of snow (Honeypot, I'm grateful you tried. :)  
  
On to the story!!!!!  
  
Meg-chan: *Crawling out of pit of doom* Um, Keltz?   
  
Keru: *eyes widen* D-did you just call me 'Keltz?'   
  
Meg-chan: Yeeeesss..... *Scowls in a amazingly scary manner*  
  
Keru: I'LL DO ANYTHING!!! NOOOO!!! DON'T HURT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!  
  
Meg-chan: Anything?  
  
Keru: Ooooooh shit...  
  
Meg-chan: You know what I'm talking about. Now do it!  
  
Keru: Can it wait until the end of the chapter?  
  
Meg-chan: *Eyes go red and pupils start turning aqua*  
  
Keru: Okay, okay! I'll do it!  
  
Meg-chan: *Snickers* Go on...  
  
Keru: IDON'TOWNANYTAMORAPIERCEBOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sobs*  
  
Meg-chan: Muwahahaha!!!! I FINALLY got you to admit it!!!  
  
===  
  
Kel stumbled up her driveway, keeping a straight face though she was in pure agony.  
  
'Why are you going back to this?' Her conscience screamed madly.   
  
'WHY are you going back to the pain?!'  
  
She didn't answer. She couldn't. Even she didn't know what she was doing.   
  
She had run away from friends. Allies, people who wouldn't hurt her. How could she?  
  
Was she really that much of a masochist?  
  
This was screamed out from the back of her mind as she slowly blocked the voice.  
  
It was right.   
  
She knew it.  
  
And she kept going back, trying to convert to what she had before.  
  
The voice raised higher, its last few words ingraved into her mind.   
  
"You CAN'T GO BACK"  
  
'I know that.' She thought calmly.  
  
In an ethereal exsistance, she pulled her housekey out of her pocket and slowly slid it into the lock, turning it with a brisk flick of her wrist. The door didn't make a sound as she swung it back along its hinges.   
  
Stepping silently and swiftly, she made her way to the living room.   
  
Her walking became more relaxed as she strode through room after room, finding each empty. He had placed the stairs towards the back of the house for one reason.  
  
More chances of catching her.  
  
She was almost to the stairs. One more room, just one more...  
  
Praying desperately, she cracked the door open. No sign of him so far...  
  
She stepped into rthe room fully, relieved that it was empty.  
  
Or so she thought.  
  
A thick fist slammed into her shoulder, sending her sprawling onto the carpeted floor, adding one more bruise and carpet burn to her list of plights.  
  
She struggled silently to get up; her already exhausted body followed her orders, but agonizingly slowly.   
  
Suddenly it hit her.  
  
It was pointless.  
  
He would always be this way.  
  
He couldn't revert to the loving being who had spoiled her so long ago.  
  
'I've been living more lies than I thought I was.'  
  
Her mother wouldn't come back. She was a bitch and a coward, and had hated her ever since she had her new baby.   
  
Her sister... She didn't even want to think of her. Brattiest thing alive, with a mean streak. She had been stronger, crueler. She was the worst, a bully with bad grades and going down the wrong path. She had hated her, gotten her into trouble more times than she could count.  
  
He had used to love her. In family spats, he always sided with her. Always.  
  
And now, who sided with her?  
  
No one.   
  
No one on earth.   
  
===  
  
Kel flopped tiredly onto her bed. In the past three months, she had changed. She no longer cared.  
  
She had found the truth.  
  
Reality had hit her, and reality wasn't a nice place to live.  
  
Nowadays, the beatings came hard, fast, and brutal. She was so achy that she could barely move enough to get around at school. She skipped P.E. Who cared?  
  
More and more often she was late to school from being knocked around all night.   
  
The door downstairs clicked open.  
  
Damn. He was home early.  
  
She didn't move. Her covers were bloodstained.   
  
Frankly, she didn't care. Used to be she'd keep her room neat and only get beaten up downstairs.   
  
Now she would just lie on her bed and await her painful thrashing that she would endure when he came up.  
  
It angered him to have to climb stairs to get at her.  
  
She didn't give a shit. She felt his hand in her hair, pulling her up, throwing her ascross the room, and founnd that in this place of pain and hate, it didn't matter. She faded into the depths of her mind, ovblivious to everything.  
  
And her mind...  
  
Was bliss.  
  
===  
  
I linger in the doorway  
  
Of alarm clock screaming monsters  
  
Calling my name  
  
Let me stay  
  
Where the wind will whisper to me  
  
Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story  
  
In my field of paper flowers  
  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
  
I lie inside myself for hours  
  
And watch my purple sky fly over me  
  
Don't say i'm out of touch  
  
With this rampant chaos - your reality  
  
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge   
  
The nightmare...  
  
I built my own world to escape   
  
In my field of paper flowers  
  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
  
I lie inside myself for hours  
  
And watch my purple sky fly over me  
  
In my field of paper flowers  
  
And candy clouds of lullaby  
  
I lie inside myself for hours  
  
And watch my purple sky fly over me.  
  
===  
  
Ooo! Dark! GO EVANESCENCE!!!! There songs fit this story perfectly. This is a multi-song chappie, so expect more of Evanescence. I don't listen to them- my sis would kill me- but I have heard this song. I really like the lyrics. They fit!  
  
Back to the story!  
  
===  
  
Kel sighed as Neal approached her in the hall. His friends were with him.  
  
She rolled her eyes. Life was so pointless these days.  
  
She halfheartedly strolled down the hall. She was currently skipping P.E. They must think it was of some importance that they talk to her. She'd been ignoring them for a long time.   
  
Deciding to humor them, she found an empty courtyard. Stepping into it, she made her way over to a tree. They were already in the doorway. No way out now.   
  
Slinging her bag onto the grassy ground, she swung herself into the tree, which was a dead apple. Being winter, its leaves were scattered about the otherwise bare courtyard.   
  
Sure it hurt to move like this...  
  
But, after all, she didn't care.  
  
===  
  
Neal's POV  
  
===  
  
Why is she ignoring us?  
  
Doesn't she want help?  
  
She smirks that smirk of hers- full of subdued pain and sorrow, of tears and acceptance that her life is hell and she can't change it.  
  
"Kel-" I say, unsure.  
  
She cuts me off. "Mindelan to you."  
  
Anger is building inside me, but I humor her for her own sake.  
  
"Mindelan, then. Why..."  
  
She glares sharply. "Why what?"  
  
"Why do you let him hurt you?" There, I said it. I anxiously await her reaction.   
  
I was expecting drama. Wrong.  
  
"What pain? I fell down."  
  
Great, my friends have deserted me.   
  
"I want to help you! We both know-"  
  
"You don't know SHIT about my life, Neal!" She yells. "It's my business- MY PAIN! And I don't need you're fucking help to bear it."  
  
===  
  
I've been watching you from a distance  
  
But distance sees through your disguise  
  
All I want from you is your hurting  
  
I want to heal you  
  
I want to save you from the dark  
  
Give unto me your trouble  
  
I'll endure you suffering  
  
Place onto me your hurting  
  
I'll drink your deadly poison  
  
Why should I care if they, hurt you  
  
Some how it matters more to me  
  
Than if I were hurting myself  
  
Save you  
  
I'll save you  
  
Give unto me your trouble  
  
I'll endure your suffering  
  
Place onto me your hurting  
  
I'll drink your deadly poison  
  
Give unto me your trouble  
  
I'll endure your suffering  
  
Place onto me your hurting  
  
I'll drink your deadly poison  
  
===  
  
Okay, almost done! One more song! Warning: This fic is almost ended. I predict aroung 4 more chappies, and then it'll be done!  
  
===  
  
Kel's POV  
  
===  
  
What to do?  
  
There goes any chance of survival.  
  
He'll kill her eventually.  
  
Soon.  
  
I don't show it.  
  
But it really hurts.  
  
Really.  
  
I want to die.  
  
The thought is quick and fleeting, but repeats over and over in my mind.  
  
That's an idea. I also don't want to die by him.  
  
Might as well.  
  
I have nothing else to do...  
  
I walk home. It's still classtime. Oh well. I can skip the whole day.  
  
It won't matter.  
  
Nothing matters anymore.  
  
My housekey stays inside the lock once I open the door. I slam it shut, striding through the house.   
  
The kitchen is my first stop.  
  
I walk quietly into my room, laying the items I was carrying on the bed. I keep hold of one, taking it into the bathroom with me. I examine my bath bubbles in a painstaking manner. I choose cherry, my favorite because it hides blood with its bright crimson hue. So I can pretend I'm all better when taking baths.  
  
I pour the whole bottle in, the red substance almost coating the floor of my giant hot tub. I run the water, warm, almost hot- just the way I like it. I go back into my room and lock the door.   
  
The bathroom door is also locked once I am within.  
  
I step into the fluffy bubbles hovering on the surface of my full bathtub. I step into the water, grabbing the object from the counter. Smiling grimly, I run the knife along my wrists, gently carving letters into ny arms. I manage to write the whole suicide note in my flesh.  
  
Go me!  
  
Now I move to the major veins on my wrists. I slash deeply into each, watching as blood pours into the water. The bubbles hide it completely. I lay my head back and close my eyes as if I'm asleep.  
  
It feels good.  
  
Why didn't I do this a long time ago?  
  
I wonder if I'll go to hell. I guess I could take that. I mean, wouldn't be too different.  
  
I fall into a wave of ecstasy from mind-numbing pain.   
  
I don't want this.  
  
I know that I could turn it around.  
  
But I'm too tired.   
  
Too worn.  
  
Too dead.  
  
Release seems perfect.  
  
The easy way out.  
  
And anything easy in a life like mine is bliss.  
  
===  
  
I tried to kill the pain  
  
But only brought more  
  
I lay dying  
  
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal  
  
I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming  
  
Am I too lost to be saved  
  
Am I too lost?  
  
My God my tourniquet  
  
Return to me salvation  
  
My God my tourniquet  
  
Return to me salvation  
  
Do you remember me  
  
Lost for so long  
  
Will you be on the other side  
  
Or will you forget me  
  
I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming  
  
Am I too lost to be saved  
  
Am I too lost?  
  
My God my tourniquet  
  
Return to me salvation  
  
My God my tourniquet  
  
Return to me salvation  
  
My wounds cry for the grave  
  
My soul cries for deliverance  
  
Will i be denied Christ  
  
Tourniquet  
  
My suicide 


	7. Chapter 7

Mirror  
  
by Keruseyu  
  
Chapter 7  
  
===  
  
-_-! I'm running out of things to do to Kel! Let's see, she gets killed in Lady of the Fairies, she gets raped in Taken, she gets her voicebox ripped out in Taken, she gets abused in Mirror, and NOW I just made her commit suicide! AHHH!!!!  
  
===  
  
She was soaking in oblivion, blackness closing around her.   
  
She thought it was the end.  
  
===  
  
'Beep... beep... beep...'   
  
Kel's eyes opened slightly, taking in a white room. She turned over sleepily. 'Stupid beeping thingy...'   
  
Why was she in a hospital? The memories from the night before flew back to her. She threw herself upright, staring at her wrists. They were both bandaged up to her shoulders, blood dotting through the cloth. Weakness hit her like a sledgehammer. She fell weakly back onto the bed.   
  
Kel tugged at the wraps, pulling them below her elbows but keeping her wrists covered. She saw the blood seeping through her carved words.   
  
'Dad. I love you, despite all you've done. No matter what, I'll always remember when you acted as a father. It's probable that you hate me nowadays, but I hope that maybe you have a small piece of the father I used to know inside you still. You used to be a good man, and I suppose you could eventually revert to that. But until then, I can't take this abuse anymore.   
  
Goodbye.'   
  
Kel fell back on the pillows. 'Odd... It didn't seem THAT sappy when I wrote it...'   
  
She closed her eyes, falling into a deep slumber.  
  
===  
  
Kel woke once more, staring into deep green eyes.   
  
"Are you okay?" Neal asked, eyebrows raised.  
  
"Never been better." She replied dryly. "Suicide's just a regular part of my schedule, you know."   
  
Neal rolled his eyes. "You really ARE better..."  
  
"Neal..." Kel stared out her window.  
  
"What?" He asked sympathetically.   
  
"What... happened to my father?"  
  
"He..."  
  
"He's not in jail, is he?"  
  
"Um..."  
  
"Spill."  
  
"Let's just say... He followed in your footsteps."   
  
  
  
===  
  
A brown-haired figure knelt by a tombstone, weeping into a kerchief.   
  
Neal, Alanna, and their friends stood in the backround, all but Neal and Yukimi scowling.   
  
"How can she CRY like that?" Alanna whispered fiercely. "Her father was a bastard!"  
  
Yukimi stared at the small figure. "Family meant much to her. She never had anyone but him after her mother left."  
  
"But he-mmff!" George, Alanna's new-found boyfriend, placed a finger on her lips. "Quiet. Let her do what she wants."  
  
===  
  
Kel gripped the knife carefully. Neal leaned against the doorframe, keeping a firm eye on her. Yukimi stood slightly behind him, clutching a first aid kit.  
  
The brown-haired girl moved the knife steadily up and down, cutting the scars her suicide message had left out of her skin.   
  
Yukimi rushed forward, tending Kel's wounds.   
  
Neal raised an eyebrow. "That's it?"  
  
She grimaced. "Just didn't want to wear long sleeves anymore. I was getting sick of it."  
  
For the first time since she had come to grips with reality three months before, Kel smiled.  
  
===  
  
Nothing can hurt,  
  
I've got nothing to hide,  
  
So guess what, reflection?  
  
You aren't that scary anymore.  
  
===  
  
YAY! It's over, over, over! ^__________________________________________^!!!!!!!!!! 


End file.
